Friday, June 22, 2007

X-Rated Revisited Questions & Answers, et al

Dear Readers: My apologies for neglecting you. I have been busy with numerous projects and promise to visit each of you soon. A big thank you to STARRLIGHT for mentioning me as a

Q: What's the difference between love, true love and showing off?

A: Spitting, swallowing and gargling.



Q: How do you embarrass an archeologist?

A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.



Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?

A: Wiped his ass.



Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?

A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.



Q: How can you tell if you're at a bulimic bachelor party?

A: The cake jumps out of the girl.



Q: How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?

A: Put a nipple on it



Q: What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?

A: Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak



Q: How is pubic hair like parsley?

A: You push it to the side before you start eating.



Q: What do you do when your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you?

A: Shorten her chain



Q: What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common?

A: They can both smell it but can't eat it.



Q: How is a woman like a condom?

A: Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.



Q: What is the similarity between a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken?

A: By the time you've finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to pop your bone in.



Q: How are twisters (tornadoes) and marriage alike?

A: They both begin with a lot of blowing and sucking and in the end you lose your house.



Q: Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?

A: Because everybody who can run, jump, and swim are already in America.



Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the jaw.



Q: What's brown and often found in children's underpants?

A: Michael Jackson's hand.



Q: Why do women have two sets of lips?

A: So they can piss and moan at the same time.



Q: What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?

A: A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch sleeps with everyone at the party except you.

10 comments:

Loving Annie said...

feeling a little frisky today, Nomas ??? Hee-hee. I love stuff like that -

Anonymous said...

I was thinking the same as loving annie! Today is a bit different than your last post, The Wooden Bowl.
Cookie

Starrlight said...

ROFL! The parsley one killed me. And you totally rock so the award was well deserved =)

TheJudge said...

Judged ... hilarious!

kittenpower said...

:-D

Rodrigo said...

Oi, achei teu blog pelo google tá bem interessante gostei desse post. Quando der dá uma passada pelo meu blog, é sobre camisetas personalizadas, mostra passo a passo como criar uma camiseta personalizada bem maneira. Até mais.

Dick said...

Hey, now that you're a big blogger, will you forget us little guys?

Flyinfox_SATX said...

ROTHFLMAO!!! I am gonna have to steal a few of these!

Flyinfox_SATX

Shawn C. said...

Good stuff! Very funny!

NoMas said...

Annie: yes maam

Cookie: yeah, a little up, a little down!

Starrlight: Thank you sweetheart

Judge: I concur.

Kitten: smiles!

Fox: go for it!

Shawn:glad to provide a laugh or two.